Thursday, January 26, 2012

The moments where everything changed.

I've been doing a lot of thinking lately about moments in my life where everything changed. Much of this thinking has been prompted from reading Journey of Souls: Case Studies of Life Between Lives, a book about our soul's past lives as well as life in the spirit world. I'm sure most of this won't jive with some of you who hold strong spiritual or religious beliefs of your own, so feel free to stop reading now. Honestly, I'm not sure what I believe to be true, but for sure, the author offers compelling information about life beyond "here" that I'm open to considering or at least writing about. One of the most fascinating ideas the author presents is that we are all a part of a "soul group" - a group of souls we encounter in most of our lives on Earth who are meant to teach us something which moves us closer to the "Source" (God). Apparently, in the spirit world, between lives, we meet with these souls and decide on "signs" that will occur on Earth that will tell us, "This person is important. This moment is significant. I need to stop and pay attention." We may not know it's a sign in our human body on Earth, but somewhere deep inside, we are called to notice and respond.

Deep stuff, eh?

I kind of like this idea of certain people, places, moments being pre-arranged by our souls to teach us something which is essential to helping us on our journey. Whether or not I believe all of Michael Newton's ideas is to be determined. But, I do, and always have, believed that certain things are just meant to be. Sometimes I've known in the actual moment that it is going to affect me for a lifetime. Other times, I haven't known it until later when I look back and can say, "Ah, NOW I see why."

***

Here are just a few of mine:

Leaving my mother in the hospital after she had Katy. It was the first time I felt the pain of separation from those we love. I saw Katy's tiny red face and didn't ever want to leave her side. I rode out of the hospital on my dad's shoulders screaming and crying to go back.

Writing and completing my first story as a middle schooler. It was called "Naomi", and it was inspired by Dances with Wolves.

Witnessing a horrible act of racism in my high school and having no idea how to handle it. Witnessing a horrible act of racism as an adult and knowing - at least a little bit - how to handle it.

Learning that adults can hurt children deeply. They can even hurt children that they love. Standing in our garage that fall night before the football game and hugging my best friend as she cried tears of anguish and shock.

A discussion about God and all things bigger on a golf course at night in Lancaster County helped me to see beyond my closed-off view of the world.

Finding out a good friend was gay and was struggling with her identity and staying by her side through it. Meeting new friends who are gay and loving them intensely for who they are: friends to us, aunts to Calvin, mothers to a sweet baby girl, so much more.

Meeting my special college friends. It all started with a movie in a dorm room. Then came pong, and the rest is history.

Making eye contact with Angus in Mad River on that Saturday night, I knew my life was about to change. I knew I had to know him, and I wanted to be near him. He says he knew I was the one he wanted to marry that night. Now, literally every time we touch, make eye contact, or connect in other ways...I still get butterflies.

Dancing with my dad on my wedding day. Singing the words to the song as we danced. Feeling a strange sense of sadness for losing him even though he wasn't gone. Listening to the same song at his funeral five years later.

Being in Taiwan. Eating the food. Experiencing the culture. Holding Angus's hand through it all. Loving every minute of it.

Taking a course at CU titled "African American and Latino Issues in Education." I learned about our country's history of oppression, was able to relate that to our current educational situation, and finally saw the truth.

Being outside with my friends as a kid...all the time. Using our imaginations and PLAYING. Loving the water. Hiking Mt. Rainier in Seattle with Angus. Moving to Boulder. Being outside as an adult...all the time (I can). Nature is my sanctuary.

My best friend and I know each other's thoughts without a single word. She can sense when I need help and when someone or something is there to help me. I really can't explain it, but she will know what I mean. How about it, Abe? ;)

A middle school boy wrote a letter to me and read it in front of the class. He hated to read and write before he met me. Now, he can call Reading and Language Arts his favorite subjects.

Meeting her for the first time. Spilling beer on a rug. Talking about running. She was nice. I knew I had met a new friend. Someone who would turn out to be a mentor in so many ways.

Living with my sister and caring for my father. There was a moment over the weekend he died - 4th of July weekend - where fireworks exploded outside his bedroom windows. He laid in bed, and Katy I held him and told him everything would be OK.

Enduring natural childbirth and looking into Calvin's deep gray-blue eyes for the first time. Now, the moments where we look at one another and crack up laughing. It's like we are on the same wavelength. I think our souls have known each other before.

***

Were some of these moments pre-arranged by my soul and others in the spirit world? Or, are they just really cool moments I've had that have changed my life? Maybe they are something in between that can never be explained? I don't know... I do know that every moment, to some degree, was life-altering and that I could probably think of a thousand more.

Random interactions with strangers, the twists and turns of our relationships, huge life decisions, stories we hear: these are the things that make us who we are and help us grow into who we want to become.

These are the moments where we need to stop, take notice, and allow in whatever it is that is knocking.

At the very least, they could inspire...say...an interesting blog post. :)

1 comment:

  1. Love the message, it definitely does make you pause and think about the day to day interactions and certain moments in your life that makes up your life as a whole, and gives you an opportunity to reflect back.

    I blog under the pen name, MommaBird, so stop by and say hi *wink*

    ReplyDelete

 
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